The biggest problem is not having a sense of belonging
I think that this culture,as a general rule,does not do right by our young adults.For me,it was the most miserable time of my life.I felt I had talents,and was a good person,but I had no skills that mattered:no relationships skills,nothing I could use to support myself in the real world.I had no place to go where I felt I belonged,and where I felt like I could do things that mattered to other people.I just felt like I didn't matter.
Well,it's thirty years later,and if anything,it seems to me,it's gotten worse.My daughter is now about to enter teendom,and I hope I can do better,but I don't know if there is much support in this culture.I don't believe in learning for learning's sake.I don't think it works very well,and I know that it feels useless to teenagers.They want to matter,I beleive,just as I did.They want to be included in society,and to do work that makes a difference.
Even if they had access to such work (and it could be done if we changed our education system),they still also want something else that I think we fail to recognize.They want to connect,desperately,to other people.Again,I'm projecting,for this is what I wanted when I was a teen.I wanted to love and be loved.People say "hormones," as if that explains it all.That may be a start,but there is a much deeper component to hormones that is about what it means to be human.We want to love,and we want to procreate,if we truly love ourselves.
I am not saying this in a religious way.I am saying this as a human.Sure,many religions may echo the same sentiments,but that's not where I'm coming from.
Procreation,of course,brings up lots of practical problems,so we try to deny our teenagers the right to do it until we think they can handle all that is associated with it.But that's silly,since we can let them experience emotions,and,at the same time,protect them from the negative consequences such as diseases,or the consequences they are unprepared for,such as children.
Although,again,here I think I have a few crazy ideas:teenagers,or perhaps twenty-somethings are in the best physical shape to bear children.Forty-somethings are probably in the best position to actually raise children.What if we supported our kids in having kids,but we,their parents,raised those kids?By the time we're really wise enough to parent,we're too old to have kids.When we're young enough to have kids,we're too young to parent.Just a crazy idea.
Teens should be experimenting in love,relationships,and work,and we older folks should be incorporating them into real world lives as much as we possibly can,so as to mentor them,train them,and help them feel a part of things,and valued.If they felt like they belonged,I believe they would be less likely to travel around in gangs,searching for things to do.They would be less likely to engage in drug use,searching for spiritual meaning,or escape from pain.THey would be less likely to engage in random sexual activity,for they would feel valued,loved,and a sense of belonging that centered them,and gave them a central role in all our communities.With these things in place,they could take their time to develop talents,feel secure that they won't suddenly be kicked out,and experiment safely with the new ideas that our whole culture will need in the future,if mankind is to survive.- -簡單點。。。你可以去掉幾段！