Three Times’ Beating Monster
人物：T唐僧 S：孫悟空 E：豬八戒 J：沙僧
B：白骨精 B1：B變成的村姑 B2：B變成的太婆
B3：B變化成的老頭 N：哪吒
T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?
S: Bajie,map!
E: (摸出,遞給S)
S: Look,master (湊近T)………（T、S一齊轉(zhuǎn)向E）
T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, nof to bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you!
E: Oh,master!Forgive me(伸手拿回)
T: (縮手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west
E: But……
T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?
E: (遞)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So.
S: Fat Pig!
E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……….
S: You will what(兇相)?
E: (軟禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).
S: Hm!
T:（輕咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?
E: You see ,master is hungry,too!
T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!
J: But master,if a monster comes while brother monkeg is away…..
T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?
S: No problem!(安裝)（B已躲在一旁偷看）
E: This is…..?
S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!
T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!
S: Bye!(走)
T: Let’s play cards!(三人開始打牌)音樂《斗地主》
B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(變成B1)
B1: (接近三人,望著)Can I join you?
T: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.
B1: (在一旁觀看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!
T: Bomb?(打出)
B1: Double King!
T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a master-hand. Come in and teach me!(準備開電網(wǎng)門)
S: (回來,看見B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)
B1: （倒)Ah……
T: (氣憤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!
S: She is a monster!
T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)
S: Oh,please don’t……
T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主題曲,走音離譜)
S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱頭)
T: (嗆住,咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!
B: (真身出現(xiàn))Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(變成太婆)
B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?
T: Daughter?...(連忙擋住地尸體)No,sorry!(陪笑,B2想看后面是什么,T擋)
S: （咬牙切齒）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后,S打,不想打到T頭,T暈,S再打死B2)
E&J: Are you Ok, master?(扶T)
J: Look,(伸食指)how many?
T:Two…..(暈乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(變成B3)
B3: (看到B1,B2尸體)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!(哭喊)
S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)
T: （想阻止,未及）You,you.(險些暈,E,J扶住 )You have killed three lives!
S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!
T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!
S: (悲,離去)（音樂,營造 “假”悲傷氣氛）《人鬼情未了》
E: Master, brother Monkey is.
T: Scratch! Don't mention that guy any more!
B: (出現(xiàn)) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸體B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飄”走)
T: （驚）You are.
B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗,被擊退)
B: (抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha.
S: (悄悄走到B后,打B,B暈)A thousand years later.
T: Wukong?
E: Oh,Brother Monkey!
J: Our hero is back!
T: I,I can't understand.What happened?
S: Master,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!
T: How,how did you find out?
S: (沉默).Monkey's intuition(直覺)
N: Excuse me, where is the cniminal?
S; Ah.you are too late ,Nezha!(對T)I've called the police.
N: (搖醒B)You are under arrest .(出示證件)You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right, anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!(帶走B)
T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小聲)
S: What?
T: I'm sorry.
S: Em? Louder,please?
T: I.am.sorry.(S 捂耳)（音樂響）《敢問路在何方》（這個放伴奏）
T: Let's go guys!( 歌)
S: You are carrying the luggage, I am leading the horse.
E: Say goodbye to the sun, Welcome evening glow.
J: Sleeping on the ground, again we set out set out, again we set out.
T.S.E.J: Ah.Ah. Sleeping on the ground again we set out.
T: One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other, the year go on. You wonder where the road is. The road is under your feet.
T.S.E.J: You uonder where the road is, the road is under your feet.