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  • 幫忙修改雅思作文

    幫忙修改雅思作文
    Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in very subject.
    To what extent do you agree or disagree?Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
    There are more and more female students in universities.So universities want to keep balance with male students.I don't think this is neccessary.
    A large amount of people think some courses only adjust for woman such as nurse and teacher of kindergarten.Because they think woman should do better than man.So these courses in the universities are full of girls.By contrast,if a girl is studying at a army school or university,many people will feel strange.
    In my opion,people are moving into professions once dominated by the other gender.For instance,nurse field are not for women.There are more and more boys study this course in thier universities.Young people should not stay by their old idea which leads to a vicious circle.They can't choose their favorite courses.
    That university places sould go to those who deserve them,on the basis of university entrance tests whether for man and woman.If you deserve to learn you should choose every courses you want.I think this is the best method.
    其他人氣:180 ℃時(shí)間:2020-04-09 22:26:20
    優(yōu)質(zhì)解答
    老實(shí)說我覺得題目不是太好,看起來有問題.
    在各個(gè)不同的專業(yè)學(xué)校應(yīng)該接受同等數(shù)量的男女生.好怪!
    首先:字?jǐn)?shù)不夠,要求250,你也差太多了吧,要被扣大分的.
    第一段,破題立意.Topic sentences,因?yàn)榕畬W(xué)生越來越多,所以學(xué)校保持男女生平衡你認(rèn)為是沒有意義的.呃……恕我直言,看不懂.
    Supporting sentences,不是很強(qiáng)烈,沒有解釋為什么大家會(huì)這么認(rèn)為,留下了懸念,要把老外當(dāng)白癡給他們解釋清楚才行.
    Concluding sentences,在學(xué)校入學(xué)考試的幫助分析下,學(xué)生們應(yīng)該選擇他們自己喜歡的專業(yè).這個(gè),是不是有點(diǎn)跑題了?
    另外就是兩個(gè)拼寫錯(cuò)誤,necessary and sould
    加油,回頭我也我點(diǎn)我作文上來,大家互相指正 :)
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