不要老用nowadays 感覺很傻.并且不要寫這么又長又不通順的話 一句話包含了兩個意思 就拆成兩句話寫.
可以這樣寫.
Currently, more and more college students chooses to travel on their own rather than travel packed by traveling agency.This is because they want time to relax.
第二段以一句話 改成被動語句.
Freedom would be released if the self-traveling has been chosen.
第二句話
The travelers can manage the touring time arbitrarily without any consideration on time limit.
不要寫at last, 就Thus, more time will be given for people to take photos and enjoy the scenery.(這句話接在第二句后面 都是講的時間 并且這個是沒有時間限制的一個結(jié)果.真是 邏輯真混亂)
然后再Moreover, travelers can buy stuffs without the orientation imposed by the travelling agency.This will maximize the benefit of the travellers.不要老是they. 而且這句話一點都不通順
As to me可以刪了. 一看就是很不專業(yè)的用法. 什么As known to all啊 這些詞語 在寫作盡量不要用 看著很低級.
直接 However, I prefer...不要it, this都要好點. pleasure改成happiness
差不多這些. 寫作還是要注意一個邏輯. 當然語言是慢慢訓(xùn)練過來的 大學(xué)了 寫作要擺脫中學(xué)老師教的那種思維 還有那些弱智般的詞匯.
請英語高手幫我點評我的這篇英語四級作文.（語法和用詞）萬分感謝
請英語高手幫我點評我的這篇英語四級作文.（語法和用詞）萬分感謝
1：大學(xué)生出去旅游經(jīng)常會選擇“自助游”
2：分析大學(xué)生選擇“自助游”的原因
3：你的看法
Nowadays,more and more college students will choose self-help travel instead of travel with a group when they want to spare a time to relax themselves.
Self-help travel,one can enjoy more freedom.The travelers can arrange their tour as they wishes without the limit of travel agency .Moreover ,they can buy something by themselves and avoid the compulsory consumption.At last,if the students like a beautiful scenic and they will have more time to leave it and take a photograph.
As to me ,I prefer to the travel with a group.Firstly,it can save more money.Secondly,I like to share the pleasure of traveling with others.Lastly,we can deal with the possible problems and difficulties better in the journey.
1：大學(xué)生出去旅游經(jīng)常會選擇“自助游”
2：分析大學(xué)生選擇“自助游”的原因
3：你的看法
Nowadays,more and more college students will choose self-help travel instead of travel with a group when they want to spare a time to relax themselves.
Self-help travel,one can enjoy more freedom.The travelers can arrange their tour as they wishes without the limit of travel agency .Moreover ,they can buy something by themselves and avoid the compulsory consumption.At last,if the students like a beautiful scenic and they will have more time to leave it and take a photograph.
As to me ,I prefer to the travel with a group.Firstly,it can save more money.Secondly,I like to share the pleasure of traveling with others.Lastly,we can deal with the possible problems and difficulties better in the journey.
其他人氣：729 ℃時間：2020-05-11 01:59:13
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